Upside of the down side

Every time I turn on the TV there is news of another awful incident plaguing our community. Instead of getting depressed I think it's time we started looking for the silver lining. Massive Layoffs:
Better parking spots for those of us still working. Peanut Butter Salmonella Scare:
All the vomiting and diarrhea really helped people keep their weight loss resolutions. Global Warming:
No need to shell out big bucks for a tropical vacation when you can get the same experience in your own back yard. Digital TV Conversion:
Now when you visit Grandpa you can spend more time working your way into his will and less time adjusting his rabbit ears. The Lead Toy Recall:
I don't know about you, but it really helped us clean out the messy playroom. Health Care Crisis:
The funeral industry is booming. All This Snow:
The homeless have been able to construct their own homes, in the form of igloos. High Gas Prices:
It is cheaper to drink and NOT drive. High Credit Card Debt:
If you can die before paying it all off, then you win. The Decline Of The Auto Industry:
With less cars on the road, when you give that jerk the finger for cutting you off, he's more likey to see it. The Fall Of The Stock Market:
No need for the thrill of a roller coaster ride. You can get the same stomach plunging feeling in the safety of your own home. Mortgage Crisis:
Those neighbors you really hate are finally going to move out. See? It's not so bad after all.